Begins and Ends (With You)
by angellwings
Summary: Wyatt Logan knows that he is a fortunate victim of dumb luck. Sure, some of it was bad luck and then he took the ball the rest of the way to the end zone and screwed it all up. Every single bit of it. But everything that happened after? Dumb luck. He is not oblivious to it. [lyatt] [oneshot] [set at the end of 212]


**A/N: **So, sometimes I play this little prompt game on my twitter. I have a list of 79 prompts and I have people send me numbers at random without seeing the list and I put three of them together to make a fic. The last time I did this, the result was a fic called For the Longest Time, which was a fun experiment for me.

Well, I decided to do it again. I've been doing a fic bracket on twitter and some of my followers have been indulging me, which is super gracious of them, so I wanted to thank them and I thought a new fic would be fitting.

Hope you like it! Happy Reading!

Angellwings

PS - see the note at the end for the prompts.

* * *

Begins and Ends (With You)

By angellwings

* * *

"I don't remember,

what those days were like,

And I don't want to.

I don't even wanna try.

There'd be no stars in my sky,

Light of my life,

Baby, where would I be?

No, fire. No, spark.

Beat in my heart.

I wouldn't be me.

Don't know what I'd do,

In a world without you."

-World Without You, The Shires

* * *

Wyatt Logan knows that he is a fortunate victim of dumb luck. Sure, some of it was bad luck and then he took the ball the rest of the way to the end zone and fucked it all up. Every single bit of it. But everything that happened after?

Dumb goddamn luck.

He is not oblivious to it.

His future self coming with Lucy's future self to give them a journal? That happened TO him not because of him. And yes, he came to the conclusion that Jessica was the root of the problem and he made the plan to go back and take her out. But that plan didn't end the way he intended. He should have been the one lost and dying in 2012.

So, Flynn running off with the Lifeboat to beat him to it? Again, it happened to him not because of him. Flynn did the dirty work and took on Wyatt's consequences for himself. He hated that outcome with every fiber of his being and, if he was honest with himself, he was more than a little pissed at Flynn for taking that punishment away from him. It was Wyatt's choice and Flynn had no right denying that choice. It made no sense and it shouldn't have happened that way.

Afterward, they came back to a present where he and Lucy were still together. He never would have expected that. It was dumb luck. _Dumb. Luck_. Was it everything he ever wanted? Abso-fucking-lutely. Did it erase his singular biggest regret to date? Fortunately. But again, that's just it, he was _fortunate_.

Then to top it all off, he's in the right place, right time to deliver a stranger's baby _and _avoid being blown up which somehow affected Lucy in just the right way so that she would not only kiss him but forgive him, and here's the biggest part, _admit to loving him._ She loved _him_. After he tossed her aside, threw Jessica in her face (albeit inadvertently), and then couldn't find the strength inside of him to let her go. Oh, and also, did he mention he was the reason their mutual best friend was murdered?

Somehow, she still loved him. _Still. _Meaning she had before and he hadn't known it. Since that hell hole known as The Alamo, she said. _The Alamo. _While he was stumbling through conflicting feelings he didn't understand, _she loved him._ The whole time he was feeling unsure about her or guilty about what that meant for saving Jessica, she already loved him. What was he supposed to do with that? How had that happened?

Where had all this luck come from? Good and bad. Were things done _happening to him _now? Was it safe to assume that he could make things happen for himself again without interference from someone else? Could people stop taking on his sins and allow him to work for his own forgiveness? He would like to feel like he had earned this happiness he'd been feeling since stepping out of the Lifeboat for possibly the last time _ever_.

He planned to earn it. He had every intention of working every day for the rest of his life to _earn_ his dumb luck. His _fortune_. What a fortunate it was, too.

His best friend was back. His wife was gone again. Rittenhouse was defeated. Lucy was in his arms.

Friendship. Resolution. Victory. Love.

It was too beautiful to be real.

Yet it was. Inexplicably, this wasn't a trick of a timeline or a dream that would leave him wanting. This was his actual life. A life that could begin anew the minute they stepped outside the bunker in just a handful of hours.

Who was he outside of this place? Who were any of them? They were no longer a ragtag task force, but maybe they were still a ragtag family? Would it be like it was before the hangar exploded? Drinks once or twice a week and maybe a game night or two but otherwise they lived separate lives? What about him and Lucy? Would they take a step back and try the slow paced dating tactic? Or would they continue at breakneck speed and just let themselves fall into it?

In the grand scheme of things, they hadn't actually known each other very long. But that isn't how it felt. He felt as though he'd known Lucy for years. _Decades, _even. What did that mean? What did it mean that over a relatively short amount of time he was willing to sacrifice everything for her? Give it all up, just to be by her side? The mission mattered less than she did. His job didn't hold a candle to her. He loved it but he loved _her_ more. In fact, he was starting to think he was obsessed with her.

Since they landed last night, something about Lucy had opened up. Yes, he could see the sadness still in her eyes for both Flynn and Amy, but something was different. _She_ was different. She was...lit up from the inside out. Laughing and smiling and carelessly putting herself in his personal space. This was a Lucy he had never really had the chance to see. He glimpsed her in Hollywood and Darlington. Maybe briefly when they thought they defeated Rittenhouse initially. But this was the first time he was truly seeing her.

Happy Lucy was a sight to behold. He decided that his new mission, his top priority, was to make sure that, from here on out, Lucy's happiness outweighed her sadness. Forget Delta Force. Knock serving his country down a spot or two. _Lucy_ was what mattered most. Yes, he still wanted a career but maybe that career looked a little different than he had always imagined. Maybe he could be flexible. Try something new. Going back to Delta Force meant leaving and he had no intention of leaving her for an extended period of time ever again. His time with Jessica was enough. Her time with Rittenhouse was _enough_.

After the hell they just crawled out of, he deserved to be a little selfish and she deserved to be loved the way he always meant to love her. That was all there was to it.

So, he had a talk with Agent Christopher and asked if she had any other options for him besides Pendleton. She grinned and nodded and told him she was hoping he would ask. It was all but official. Once he had gotten dressed, he spent the morning filling out paperwork that Christopher would be faxing off right away. Again, dumb luck. Somehow, someway, things were actually falling into place.

Provided Lucy was on the same page he was, that is. Which is what led him to now, anxiously waiting in his and Lucy's room for her to come back from the shower. What if he did this and she didn't want him to? Should he have discussed it with her first? Was it too much pressure too early?

No, he decided, this was right. Whether he was with Lucy or not, he couldn't see himself going back to Delta Force after time travel and secret cults. That didn't feel right. He was tired. He wanted something simpler. Maybe a job that wasn't so all encompassing and might allow him to achieve some sort of work-life balance. He'd never had that before. He wanted it now.

Lucy sauntered into the room in her silky floral robe and Wyatt nearly stopped breathing. Partially because of nerves, but mostly because she was just so damn beautiful. Had he really spent the previous night in the same bed as her? It wasn't a dream? His memories took him back a few hours to the feeling of his arms wrapped around her and the smell of her hair and the heat of her body. No, it wasn't a dream. Not this time.

She smiled softly at him and quirked a single concerned brow. He could only imagine how he looked to her, sitting on the edge of the bed with his knee bobbing anxiously up and down and his gaze fixated on her face.

"You okay?" She asked as she put her toiletry bag in one of the improvised cubbies on the wall and grabbed her lotion.

He swallowed thickly and took too long to answer, but how could he say anything after she sat down and started rubbing lotion all over her bare legs? He hadn't seen quite enough of those legs yet and he didn't think he ever would.

"Fine," he replied. He knew he was unconvincing.

She finished one leg and then began work on the other. He bit back a groan.

Her eyes met his and they were smiling but unbelieving. "You're cute when you're worried. You've got a little pout happening." He pulled his bottom lip back in as soon as she said it and she chuckled softly at him. "Mind telling me what you're worried _about_?"

He took a deep breath and released it slowly. "I did something and I'm _worried_ I should have talked to you about it first."

"Depends on what you did," Lucy replied with a shrug as she finally finished spreading lotion on her legs. She put the lotion back and then crossed the room to close their door. "Neither of us know how I'll react until you tell me."

She dropped the robe, with only a brief moment of hesitance, and the action struck him hard in the chest. Not just because she was naked and it was quite a view, but because it represented a new level of intimacy. The quiet trust it took for Lucy to dress so openly in front of him was not lost on him. The lust starting to sizzle over his skin didn't fog up the significance of that gesture.

He watched for a moment as she put on a plain set of matching cotton underwear and then pulled a red and white turtleneck over her head. The red hem sat at her hips, emphasizing the curves there and the bare legs that extended downward, and he thought she looked comfortable, _cozy_. Instead of going out there to celebrate Christmas with their makeshift family, he was tempted to ask her to just stay in bed with him. Not even for sex, just to..._enjoy_ each other. He would happily just lay side by side with her to feel the texture of that sweater underneath his palms. No more, no less.

"You look really cute in that sweater." The words left his mouth before he could stop them. He knew he didn't address the topic at hand and he knew he shouldn't be grinning at her after that accidental topic avoidance but he couldn't help it. It was Christmas and Lucy was standing in front of him in a sweater and not much else. Why wouldn't he be grinning?

She laughed and shook her head at him before walking over to stand in between his legs. "Don't think flattery will you get out this, Logan. You brought it up and now you have to tell me."

He skimmed his hands up the outside of her thighs and then under her soft sweater until they encircled her waist. He took in the feel of her skin for a moment before he spoke with a loud sigh. "I took a job."

He could feel her muscles clench under his hands.

"Pendleton, already?" She asked. "I mean, I knew it would be soon but I didn't think—" she stopped herself short and let out a sigh that matched his from earlier. "Where and when?"

"Here and I don't know when yet. Christopher hasn't heard back on that part."

She sucked in a sharp breath and then he felt her hands frame his face, but she didn't pull his gaze up to meet hers. "Here? But how can that be? Aren't Delta Force Missions usually, you know, _anywhere_ else?"

"The job isn't a Delta Force mission," he replied. She sounded so disappointed that he might be leaving. It was building his confidence for his next bit of news. He hoped his suspicions weren't wrong.

Only then did she turn his face up to look at hers. She was trying and failing to bite back a grin and her eyes were bright with unshed tears. "What did you do, Wyatt?"

"I asked Christopher if she had anything for me that might keep me local. Keep me here."

"With me?" Lucy asked hopefully.

He smiled warmly and nodded before giving her a look that hopefully communicated that answer should be obvious. "Yes, with you."

"I—I am thrilled. Please don't think I'm not," she said as she slid her hands through his hair. "But you don't have to do that for me. I'm not asking you to give up Delta Force. You've worked so hard to be where you are, Wyatt. I couldn't ask you to let that go."

"You're not asking. I'm offering. And, to be honest, I'm doing this for me too." His hands tightened around her waist as he held her gaze. He wanted her to hear every word of what he was about to confess. She deserved to know the full extent of what he's been thinking and feeling. "I used my job as an escape, Lucy. It was dangerous but positive work and if I had no one to come back to then what better way was there to live? If anything happened then I died doing something important and it wasn't as if I had anyone left to miss me. I was alone and full of guilt and somehow that seemed fair and _right_." He paused and took a deep steadying breath. "But I'm not alone anymore, am I?"

He heard her sniffle and saw one quiet tear escape down her cheek. "No, you're not. We have each other."

"I have someone I would miss now and someone I never want to leave behind again. I couldn't go back to that life even if I tried. Not unless you went with me," he added as she squeezed her hips playfully.

A watery laugh filled the air between them and she shook her head at him. "Oh no. I would be a terrible soldier. Could you imagine? Me flailing through every mission? I mean, what am I saying? You don't have to imagine. You lived it."

"You still don't see it, do you?" He asked her in amazement.

"See what?"

"You already _are_ a soldier. Hell, you handled time travel better than half my Delta Force buddies would have. I know guys that would have cracked up after the first mission. But not you. _Never you_," he admitted as he tugged her closer.

She rolled her eyes at him and wrapped her arms around his shoulders. "You're giving me too much credit. Besides, if you'll recall I did nearly crack up. Several times."

"Nearly, being the keyword," he said with a pointed look of respect. "You're scrappy, Lucy Preston. Time travel wasn't going to get the best of you. Not ever."

"What did I say about flattery, Master Sergeant?" Lucy asked him with a blush.

"It's not flattery. It's the facts, ma'am," Wyatt told her with a challenging smirk. "So," he said as he took in another nervous breath. "Are you okay with this? With the new job? I'll still have to travel every now and then depending on the case but never for very long and when I am here it should be pretty normal hours."

"If you're okay with it then I'm okay with it," she said as she slid into his lap and pressed herself closer to him. "I want you to be happy, Wyatt. You deserve that."

He scoffed and kissed her lips quickly. "No I don't. Not yet. But I will."

Her brow furrowed and she leaned back to search his face. "What does that mean? You don't think you deserve to be happy?"

"I haven't earned the right to be happy yet, Lucy," he said with a shake of his head and a huff. "What have I done to deserve it? Yes, okay, I apologized to you and Rufus and Jiya — the whole team. But did I actually do anything to make it right?"

"What, exactly, do you think you should have done?" Lucy asked in concern.

There was a prolonged moment of somber silence before he finally worked up the nerve to say it out loud.

"For starters, it should have been me stuck in 2012. Not Flynn."

Lucy swallowed loudly and closed her eyes. "Please never say that again. It's hard enough with losing Amy and Flynn. I never want to imagine losing you too. Not again."

"Lucy—"

"No, I'm talking now." She said through pursed lips and a stern stare. "Do you really think that you deserve happiness less _now_ because of Flynn's sacrifice? Do you also think that I would have, for one second, let you go back to 2012 without me? Flynn went alone because he knew the alternative was all of us going together. Do you want to know why that was the alternative? Do you?"

There was pressure in his chest from the anger in her tone and the heated emotions in her brown eyes. She was pissed. That was not the reaction he expected. The idea of him thinking she should have lost him wasn't just upsetting; It was offensive.

"Wyatt? _Do you_?" She repeated.

"No, I suppose I don't," he said. His voice cracked midway through. He couldn't explain why, but seeing her this riled up over his hypothetical death left him in awe. He knew Lucy was passionate but seeing her passionate _about him_ was still new.

"Because I would honestly rather die _with you_ than live without you. That's the truth of it. Maybe it's too soon to be so upfront but in the face of what you just said I don't give a damn," her tone was harsh and firm but her eyes were soft. Her tone turned soothing as she continued and he closed his eyes as he felt her fingers combing through his hair. "You deserve to be happy, Wyatt. No matter what you may think. You suffered just as much as any of us. Just as much as Flynn, just as much as me, or Jiya or Rufus. You have lived with guilt for far too long. Please, let it go. You don't owe anyone anything. No, wait, I take that back. You do owe one person."

"Who's that?" He asked with a gulp.

"Yourself," Lucy said as she pressed a kiss to his temple. "You owe it to yourself to let go of the past and just be happy. Enjoy the present. We're here together. We're safe and, most importantly, we're done running. Now, we get to just _be_ for a while. Don't lose sight of that."

"Letting go of the guilt won't be easy for me," he warned her.

"I'm aware. You have a big heart, Wyatt. Once you let people inside of it, you have a hard time letting them go. But we'll work on it," Lucy assured him before her stern frown melted into a self deprecating grin. "It's not like loving me will be easy for you either. I'm sure you've noticed, but I have a tendency to ignore how I feel for the sake of others."

"Yeah, that is a bit of a problem," he agreed with a soft teasing smile. "But we'll work on it."

She laughed lightly as he repeated her words back to her and then met his eyes with more warmth and affection than he ever thought possible. "I love you. You deserve to be happy, and I will make you believe it even if I have to repeat it to you every day. If I say it enough, I think I can convince you."

"You can convince anyone of anything," Wyatt said with a chuckle. "So I have no doubt about that."

She closed the distance between them and pressed her forehead to his. She didn't press her lips to his. She merely sat there, on his lap, and breathed him in. He couldn't help but breathe her in too.

"Is it possible to love too much?" He asked in a quiet voice - almost a whisper.

"If it is, then that's how I feel about you," Lucy answered. "I have never loved this fiercely before. Only with you."

He nodded his agreement and somehow managed to gather her closer to him. "Only with you."

Just as he was about to lean in and capture her lips with his, their door rapidly opened with an obnoxious metal creak. Lucy scrambled to get off his lip and situated behind on the bed. He nearly dropped her in her haste.

She quickly threw a pillow at the door and all but squeaked when she yelled at their intruder. "Rufus!"

"Oh! Hey! Sorry! Uh, you're not wearing pants," Rufus said as he placed a hand in front of his eyes and pointed his face down toward the floor.

"Yes, that would be why the door was _closed_," Lucy grumbled.

"You sure? Cause it looked like it was maybe closed so you two could do something else," Rufus said with a smirk. "Besides, we all know this is hardly the most compromising position I have ever found the two of you in. You've never been embarrassed about it before."

Wyatt laughed and gave Lucy a playful grin. "I mean, he's got a point."

"Traitor," she said with a roll of her eyes. "Shut the damn door, Rufus."

"Right, yeah, okay. Just hurry up and get out here already. Christopher says she has presents and she is way more into Christmas than I anticipated. I mean, have you seen her sweater?" Rufus asked with a grin as his hand stayed firmly in place over his eyes.

"Rufus, _the door_," Lucy reminded him with a glare.

"We'll be out in a second," Wyatt replied with a chuckle. "You'd better go before she throws something heavier than a pillow."

"Good call," Rufus said with a nod. "Sorry, again! Also, just so happy you two are back together—or together for the first time, I guess, right?"

"_Rufus_."

"Right, sorry! I'm gone!"

The door closed a moment later but Lucy waited until she heard his footsteps disappearing down the hall before she dared to move. When she sagged behind him and breathed a sigh of relief, Wyatt couldn't help but laugh.

"What is so funny, Logan?" Lucy asked with a huff as she marched over to the shelf where her pants were waiting for her.

"I was just thinking, you know, Rufus walking in on us is kind of a tradition at this point," Wyatt told her through a chuckle. "And we're leaving this hell hole today so it just makes sense."

Lucy gave him a confused look as she zipped and buttoned her fly, but said nothing. Wyatt stood from the bed, wrapped his arms around her waist, and lifted one shoulder carelessly.

"One more for the road, you know?" he said with a laugh.

She rolled her eyes but laughed along with him. "You're ridiculous, and that was _not _funny."

"You're right. It wasn't funny. It was hilarious. I don't think I've ever heard your voice go that high before."

She smacked his shoulder as she took his hand and dragged him from the room. "Jerk."

"Takes one to know one, Babydoll."

* * *

**A/N: **Prompts:

"You're cute when you're worried."

"You look really cute in that sweater"

"Is it possible to love too much?"

Thanks for reading!

Angellwings


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